went to the saturday meet as usual…..

went for talk and lunch and hot chocolates after with a wise friend from the meet…

we talked about my lesson on the job and how this experience is a gentler and faster version of what happened before…

but didn’t take six months to materialize…

she said it’s about respect and the person i am working for presently behaved dishonorably…

she said if he asks me to stay REALLY don’t..

trust the universe….

my higher power…

my gohonzon…

will step in with something better..

i’m enjoying my last day’s and giving my best…

we also talked of l.o.v.e.

this is the person who had the dream about me with the baby girl….

i asked what age as the dream i had it was a little baby..

she said she was a toddler and had long dark hair and looked like me…

happy

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came home last night and cleaned my apartment whilst listening to an old boy george tune generations of love…watched the new mui mui campaign and it reminded me how much i loved that song…

it has been raining practically non stop….

i was singing coming home from a women’s buddhist meet… that was alright……there not great i have to admit…

i kept getting the urge to want  to leave..

and a man said to me…

it takes a special kind of women to sing in the rain…

touche…

that day my boss had a talk with me and he doesn’t want to keep me…

two reason’s the girl that was meant to be leaving isn’t and he doesn’t think i suit big venue’s..

i disagree..

oh… and i didn’t wow him…

i was misssing the wow factor……

i was fine i think he was surprised…

reminded me of when a boyfriend say’s…i don’t thnk this is working and to his surprise instead of begging for a second chance..

your bright and breezy about it and the wonder if they made the right decision?

he said i could stay till i get another job but that sounds so vague so i got him to be more clear and i’m finishing next week..

have no bad feelings towards him..

enjoying being there and have NO DOUBT that i will be going on to something even better..

i’m off now for an interview..

my goal to have something by the time i leave…

i shall!!!!

had breakfast with marie cybelle this morning at our usual haunt baker and spice…

she looks great…

she’s  back in paris on monday and will send me an eiffel tower as a late birthday present..

she can choose the size..

i met amanda for lunch last week….we hadn’t seen each other for an age…

at the electric………

the last time i saw her i gave her lawrence’s number and she was off changing her name…

before moi!!!

and being a l.a. girl…

dappling in kabbalah…. without the red bracelet…(but she’s stayed a buddhist)

and pursuing her acting…

so lots to catch up on…

l o n g……………………l u n c h………………

she did not change her name legally in america…so the power doesn’t work..

she now has her green card so can do it when she returns in autumn so things have not gone so swimmingly for her as they would have… could have……should have………..

it was really good to see her…

she said i look really well…

after i went to my buddhist group meet and took strawberries…

i am really liking my buddhist group alot…

even the person  that i really clashed with i’m getting on with…

he was very respectful…

so this is my dune i lay on…………

on my blue towel…

i swam in the sea  even though it was sort of chilly when you put your toes in..

when i got back to rye i had to lock my bike on the gate and then found somewhere nice to have dinner..

one of my favourite restuarants….is now a trendy hair salon..

i wanted somewhere that felt right and went to the ship which i’d never tried before…

it was lovley…

glass of champagne..

fish pie..

cheese for dessert…

they had lots of books and i rustled through famous cities of the world..

the train back was so quick…

the speedy one…

tthis was my view of hastings beach where i stopped for 40 minutes before i got the next connecting train to delightful rye….

i felt better just seeing the sea…

i started my journey rushing for the train…hot chocolate and latest harpers bazaar in hand…

i liked everything about my journey…

when i got to rye i walked round the town..

then went to hire a bike to cycle to the beach…

i visited rye alot with my ex and there something about the place that i love still..

it’s home away from home…

the bikes he showed me looked a bit big so i got a kiddy one which was much better…

with a basket and off i went…

cycling down the path to the beach through paddocks…

heaven!!!

i told the animals i don’t eat you…

i feed a horse i liked english strawberries….on the way to the beach and back…

he pushed the other horses out of the way…

next time i’ll take him apples….

my birthday……

i have just got back from the beach….

camber sands in rye east sussex…

i loved it…

i took the train even though it’s hours away…

three hours there….

two back…

amazing…

oh to feel sand in my toes…..

i swam even though the water wasn’t that warm…

after day’s of rain i got sun as soon as i stepped of the train…

i’m beaming….

bought myself the most lovely piece of art from a local rye artist and i love it…

have just hung it in my bedroom…

i need the sea…

happy birthday to me!!!!

just have time to blow out a candle before midnight…

i rang lawrence (numerologist) in the morning to tell him how well my session went…

it was a quick call as i was rushing to work…

he’s so supportive of me…

mark who i worked with wanted a quick name analysis so i got one but i think it’s better for him to call lawrence directly..

i just want to be in the studio as much as possible…

that means money so i can…

lawrence gave me my lucky numbers and said to buy a lottery ticket every week and now he doesn’t mind me looking for another job because it’s to pay for studio time…

that is 100% my focus…

he said the money will come somehow someway…

no doubt!!

thats what i love about lawrence he’s soooooooooooooo positive…

i have already bought a lottery ticket….

met adelya after work for a quick hot chocolate…

i said it’s  NO MORE designer clothes for now and all my excess cash towards studio time..

(the more the better!!!!!)

she said every time i see you your in a different outfit….

(thankyou ellis!)

i sooooooooo adore clothes….

there like air for me …..a necessity!!!

after i went too my spiritual meet…

so today i went to the studio to start recording my new song….

it went so well………

i really liked the studio it has natural light and is up high and i really liked mark who worked so well on the song and came up with great ideas…

we got lot’s done in our five hours…

he really liked the song…alot…

he said it reminded him of one of his favorite bands that he flies to new york to see..

but my song is slower and sleazier…

made him think of the 50″s and paris…

i took it as a compliment…

it was meant as one….

i so enjoyed!!!!

i’m under strict instructions to not listen to our rough demo (which is really good) more than once a day..

which i won’t….

and not to play to anyone until its finished…

which i won’t!!!

i have an instrumental version too to practise on till our next session

last few days…..

i was reading my coco chanel book at the cafe waiting for my spiritual meet to start…

i’m half way through….

just got up to  the part where boy dies…(great name)

after i signed adelya’s papers for the name change…

under occupation i put singer songwriter…

adelya said i’m getting even younger looking and keep changing the more and more she see’s me…

i have also written out my song today to copyright….

on pale pink paper…

have to post to myself tomorrow..

i have to wear my hair tied back for work and when i got home on sat ur day to my american vogue i saw these images for louis vuitton and decided it’s got to be a ponytail and promptly wore it the next day…

but i didn’t put enough product on my tail…..more tomorrow…

day off today…

did music…

yoga…

rang lawrence and got my friend marie cybele’s name analysis as she asked me too when she visited the other week…

marie cybele is interested but skeptical….

she thinks he want’s to change everybody’s name…

i emailed it to her…

lawrence said i can EASILY have an agent and a record deal in six months…

i also rang my mother the night before for our weekly catch up and she said it’s amazing how fast everything seems to be happening since i changed my name…